Here’s to the fighter cocks

This article first appeared in MARKETING Weekender Issue 357

By THE HAMMER

Here’s to those who stand up for doing the right thing in our industry!

To those who believe in the best way to woo the consumer, and make it happen through sheer perseverance and tenacity.

To those who do not whine when their best people leave them. Life is short, the best always returns to the best.

Here’s to those who tire of crusaders preaching about sustainability but do not even carry a handkerchief and take showers twice a day. Bathing out of a bucket saves 50% water.

These environmental do-gooders love to dumb you down, and yet have not heard of the two-bucket car wash method.

Hanky, not panky, beats paper towels any day: paper towels emit 10 grams of carbon dioxide per sheet.

Here’s to those who see through jargon designed for client’s egos. Words that leave all feeling good about nothing: “end-to-end solutions”. This term miraculously resolves everything and can even displace real work.

Here’s to those who fight the good fight to preserve our self-worth, battle those bent on diminishing our true value, and uphold dignity in our profession.

And in case some of you think I have disenfranchised female readers with all this cock talk, the picture featured here is of a female fighting hen.

That’s gender balance for you.