How to take the bullshit out of the jargon

How many times have you heard the following words being peppered in business conversations and interactions with people in the marketing communications industry?

“End to end solutions” is a term generously proffered by people offering anything from a proposal for a product launch to a television commercial project.

“Here is its actual meaning according to Techopedia: An end-to-end solution (E2ES) is a term that means that the provider of an application program, software and system will supply all the software as well as hardware requirements of the customer such that no other vendor is involved to meet the needs. E2ES includes installation, integration, and setup.

“Game-changer” is probably the number one ice-breaker for those who claim to be “killing it” in the business.

Sprinkle “game-changer” in your discourse and it will bring any conversation to life. Including peaking the interest of nearby eavesdroppers. I personally know many “game-changers” in our industry who seriously need a nappy change from all that fancy posturing.

“Social” is another magic word that makes anyone with half a foot in the industry sound like Jack Ma. Try these on for size: social PR, social culture, social engineering, social hygiene, social narrative.

“Geo-fencing” is the go to solution for everything you wish to make precious, exclusive and sound important. Its first cousin “ring-fencing” is another derivative of the same plot which can turn a simple explanation into a priceless blueprint for the future. “Once we ring-fence our priorities by deviating market pressures to the fringe, we can liberate the brand in an ecosystem which enriches the customer experience.”

Not convinced?

But you must admit, it takes the hard work out of its original meaning: Geo-fencing is a feature in a software program that uses the global positioning system (GPS) or radio frequency identification (RFID) to define geographical boundaries.

And when you do understand what Remarketing means, you’ll more amazed how the word is fluidly recycled into arguments that have nothing to do with its original context.

Effervescent spin masters have been overheard prescribing Remarketing as a solution for couples bitten by bed bugs in cinema halls to cryptocurrency crackheads punting on the next big thing.

My personal favourite which I use shamelessly because it elevates both the sender and recipient to celestial heights is “luminous”.

Because “have a luminous day” adds wonder to the existential phenomenon of being a human in a dreaded sea of mindless zombies.

By the Turbanned Stranger 

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