Man gets his testicles trapped in an IKEA chair, asks them for help on Facebook

I guess you pretty much got the gist of the story just from the headline itself.

Norwegian Claus Jørstad had knee problems, so he decided that it would be a good idea to get a stool so he could sit down in the shower.

At IKEA, he decided to go for the comfy looking ‘Marius’ stool.

Although, there was something Claus had forgotten about: the stool had 8 small holes in it, something that would soon cause an uncomfortable, unpredictable problem.

“Once I got home, I put my new piece of furniture in the shower and got in, this time without clothes.

“I calmly sat down on the stool and soaped up my whole body, including the ‘captain’ and his ‘two sailors’. As you might imagine, the sailors are what dangles between my legs, but since this is a public Facebook post I’ll stick to more flowery language.”

“So, when the deck got slippery and the captain and his crew got dizzy from all the foam, they started sliding around like drunk sailors!” Claus continued.

“Then something terrible happened. A sailor unwittingly made his escape and slid down one of the holes in the stool. I didn’t notice at first, but as you know things tend to expand when they are warmed up. And when a sailor gets really hot, then he really expands in size. I didn’t notice this until I tried standing up, only to find that the stool was hanging on behind me, and a searing white pain went through me like lightning. That good-for-nothing sailor was stuck in the hole!”

“So there I sat. And sat. I was thinking about my predicament and trying to figure a way out of it. I couldn’t pull up the sailor, and I wasn’t sure if I would be able to push him up from below without having to go to the hospital. So I kept sitting there, pondering.”

But as he was sitting there in the accidental trap, the problem started solving itself:

“I sat there until I ran out of hot water – and when the hot water runs out, you get cold, terribly cold.” he writes, and continues:

“Since I started getting cold, I thought about how I could keep warm, so I tried reaching for the hair dryer… and guess what happened?!? The cold had made that damn sailor shrink again, and with a pop I was a free man once more!”

Best part, IKEA responded back with the perfect reply.

“Hello Claus. We’re sorry to hear that your crew got in trouble and that the Coast Guard almost had to intervene. We recommend you take this stool out of the shower and put a nice flower pot on it. If you do decide to keep it in the shower, then make sure that you’re wearing the right clothing for a rough day at sea – we recommend putting on a sou’wester. Have a great day,” responded IKEA.

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